Short Shower Scene

From e-mail (With an addendum from the writer)
" I don't think of the whole thing as a marital tragedy any more."


I almost never come home from work during the day (it's almost an hour's drive) but a couple days ago I got to work and found I had forgotten to bring a USB drive containing a major report I had to turn in that day.

When I got home I saw that a worker (a young black man) had laid his clippers aside in the yard. That seemed unlike him; he always cleans things up when he's done.  When I went into the house I heard the upstairs shower running.

The shower has one of the massage units that makes a lot of noise. When I peeked into the bathroom I was stunned by the outline of what I saw in the frosted shower glass. 

As the water poured over them, my wife was on her knees in front of this guy. From their silhouette in the glass I could make out her hands on his hips with his cock in her mouth. She appeared to be really into what she was doing.

I froze, totally stunned. But I knew when the shower was shut off they would hear my car leave the driveway. I didn't want to be forced into some action, especially since I wasn't sure what I should do.

I tip-towed back downstairs, grabbed my USB drive and went back to work -- not that I could concentrate on work after that.

If I bring it up I assume I will be forced to take some action -- fire him, threaten divorce, something.

What should I do?

People we hear from who have knee-jerk reactions to things like this generally regret them.

My advice (were I to start giving advice based on very limited knowledge) is to do nothing.

Assuming you want to stay married, what would you ideally want her to do if she caught you in the same situation? Do unto others....

However, if you determine that things are changing in your marriage (because of you or because of her) you may want to revisit this.

Keep in mind that if it weren't for the USB drive you would never know about this and we assume the marriage would go on without a major ripple.

Granted, it may be difficult to get this image of the two of them out of your mind, but what you saw was undoubtedly consensual and I doubt if this tryst is really a threat to your marriage.

If it really bothers you, try spending some time looking at black-on-white porno. It will probably help desensitize you.

-Dr. Dave Weston

Later update form writer.
'm glad I "counted to 10." [This e-mail was dated more than a month after the one above.]

I'll admit at first I felt I had to immediately confront her. The only reason I didn't was because of what you said, plus I didn't want this to blow up and escalate into threats of divorce or whatever. (We have short fuses and tend to say things we later regret.)

Then I started going through what I was going to say. But from the beginning I had said that he was a good worker, so there was no valid reason to fire him -- at least without revealing what I saw, which, of course would mean I would be forced to take some action. Then, things could get ugly. Plus, I'm pretty sure it wasn't entirely his idea.

Has this changed things in our marriage? If anything, my wife seems more relaxed and attentive. Our yard is still being well taken care of, so on that score I would have no excuse to fire him.

Then there is this. Over the years I've slowed down and our sex life has dropped off.

When I try to get turned for sex I picture her on her knees in front of this guy enthusiastically working on what looked like a pretty big cock.

As insane as it might be, a part of me hopes that the guy is now meeting her needs.

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